News: September 13, 2024
Dear Members and Friends,
Back when I was a mom of young children, I felt somewhat adrift. I was disappointed in the lack of meaning and depth in my own culture. So many of our holidays were associated with materialism. Buying decorations and presents, the consumption of lots of sugar and a sense of hollowness and disconnection. I wanted activities that brought my little family together. I wanted to do things that brought us closer with relatives, neighbors and good friends. Over the years, I intentionally worked to find some. I looked deeper and found that some were already there, like singing Christmas carols with my side of the family every Christmas eve at our gathering, or our annual trip to the church’s Spring Retreat and other friend group camping trips. Our little family began a nightly ritual at dinner of telling our high and low for the day.
I learned some ideas from church friends too. One thing we started doing in December was driving out to the country to cut down a Christmas tree and driving around to see the holiday lights in various neighborhoods, singing carols and drinking hot chocolate from a shared thermos. Now that our children are grown, my husband, Charlie and I have added a new Halloween ritual. We put on a simple costume (usually just a hat) and sit on the front porch with the big bowl of candy and engage with the families going up and down the street, engage with each child, commenting on their costumes, talking with parents, enjoying the rather unusual night happening all over the city and in many places throughout the country of people out of their houses engaging with their neighbors in this strange, cool old ritual.
Our church provides lots of rituals annually. Every year we trek the 2 long blocks to the Emergency Aid Coalition with our wagons and Easter attire, carrying canned goods to help our neighbors in need. Every year we jump over the fire with the Feast of All Good Children. And we have a new ritual that started last year…. our Family Ritual & Chalice-Making event that we will do again this coming Sunday. We’ve created a booklet of rituals, including bedtime poems, songs, ideas for special occasions. The chalice and songs from the closing circle provide a center for possible weekly and daily home activities. I love the ritual our younger families did the past few weeks of memorizing a poem. A memorized poem can be said together as family while driving somewhere in the car, while taking a walk around the neighborhood or at a weekly family meeting. Weekly family meetings can be places where perhaps there is a game, a favorite snack, talking about each other’s week, working on becoming our best selves, feedback from family members on ways we can get along best and more. There can be a chalice lighting and reading or poem, and/or singing a song too.
I encourage all of us at church to not only join the church’s rituals but also learn from each other, ways we can deepen our connections to our values and to each other through creating meaningful, regular activities in our lives. Let’s talk to each other about what we do regularly that grounds us. What do you do with friends and family on holidays that brings joy? I look forward to talking with you and hearing about your conversations.
Love,
Carol
Back when I was a mom of young children, I felt somewhat adrift. I was disappointed in the lack of meaning and depth in my own culture. So many of our holidays were associated with materialism. Buying decorations and presents, the consumption of lots of sugar and a sense of hollowness and disconnection. I wanted activities that brought my little family together. I wanted to do things that brought us closer with relatives, neighbors and good friends. Over the years, I intentionally worked to find some. I looked deeper and found that some were already there, like singing Christmas carols with my side of the family every Christmas eve at our gathering, or our annual trip to the church’s Spring Retreat and other friend group camping trips. Our little family began a nightly ritual at dinner of telling our high and low for the day.
I learned some ideas from church friends too. One thing we started doing in December was driving out to the country to cut down a Christmas tree and driving around to see the holiday lights in various neighborhoods, singing carols and drinking hot chocolate from a shared thermos. Now that our children are grown, my husband, Charlie and I have added a new Halloween ritual. We put on a simple costume (usually just a hat) and sit on the front porch with the big bowl of candy and engage with the families going up and down the street, engage with each child, commenting on their costumes, talking with parents, enjoying the rather unusual night happening all over the city and in many places throughout the country of people out of their houses engaging with their neighbors in this strange, cool old ritual.
Our church provides lots of rituals annually. Every year we trek the 2 long blocks to the Emergency Aid Coalition with our wagons and Easter attire, carrying canned goods to help our neighbors in need. Every year we jump over the fire with the Feast of All Good Children. And we have a new ritual that started last year…. our Family Ritual & Chalice-Making event that we will do again this coming Sunday. We’ve created a booklet of rituals, including bedtime poems, songs, ideas for special occasions. The chalice and songs from the closing circle provide a center for possible weekly and daily home activities. I love the ritual our younger families did the past few weeks of memorizing a poem. A memorized poem can be said together as family while driving somewhere in the car, while taking a walk around the neighborhood or at a weekly family meeting. Weekly family meetings can be places where perhaps there is a game, a favorite snack, talking about each other’s week, working on becoming our best selves, feedback from family members on ways we can get along best and more. There can be a chalice lighting and reading or poem, and/or singing a song too.
I encourage all of us at church to not only join the church’s rituals but also learn from each other, ways we can deepen our connections to our values and to each other through creating meaningful, regular activities in our lives. Let’s talk to each other about what we do regularly that grounds us. What do you do with friends and family on holidays that brings joy? I look forward to talking with you and hearing about your conversations.
Love,
Carol
